Something old

Another one of those things I wrote when I was heartbroken:

Speaking the truth, speaking your heart out, laying bare your soul and disclosing your long hidden secrets - being able to do that is so liberating. And what's more, when you're able to do that with someone, it's addictive. It's an obsession.

You've lived your whole life putting up barriers, protecting your heart, swearing to your closest friends that there are some secrets about yourself you'll never reveal. But then you chance upon someone who plants that sense of freedom in you, who ignites that spark, who awakens that part of you. And you can't stop. And it's completely unfair because you've spent so many years constructing that fortress around your heart and soul, as if you had to lay it brick by brick with your own two hands. But along comes this person, this singular cause of your ecstatic, euphoric need to speak the truth from within the deepest recesses of your heart. It's so unfair because this person is so interested in all your little secrets, your treasures. You need only hear the glee in his voice to pour out more of yourself for him to see.

And then he's gone. But before he leaves he hides in the corner to laugh at your gullibility. And once he's left, it's as if he's taken those parts of you  with him. He lit a fire in you and stole your secrets as they escaped out. And now the only thing that's left is that burning empty fortress, still burning, even with no

one left to stroke the fire, obsessed with feeling that sense of euphoria again, but  with nothing left to protect.

Man..Why do I even try.